Funny Status Messages

   Charlie Sheen is Kenny Powers with more money.

   Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!!

   Just because you a ten cent hoe don't make you a dime piece

   At the mall this weekend.... The angry parents screaming for their son "Marco!!!" did not find it amusing when I kept yelling "POLO!!!" back at them from my dressing room.

   I would kill to see a Dave Chapelle Charley Murphy: True Hollywood Story of Charlie Sheen... :\

   The NEW Black Panthers? what happened to the OLD Black Panters.?

   An elderly woman at an ATM asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.

   Looking back on my childhood....I'm sure Daffy Duck was on that drug "Charlie Sheen".

   I'm in time out because apparently riding the dog like a small pony is outlawed in this house...grrrrr

   Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!!

   “Come on, dude. Grow a pear.” - farmer to a barren tree

   Lindsey Lohan wants to work again. The community service over all ready?

   why do all the women on Maury SCREAM when they talk?

   Lindsey Lohan is on the back burner now, her comment..."oh no he didn't"

   Lindsey Lohan speaks out.....who cares, we quit you. Go Charlie Go Charlie

   For some strange reason, no matter where I go, the place is always called "here"

   on the days I don't show up to work, ima tell my boss, I didn't miss work, I missed practice, we not talking about work here, we're talking about PRACTICE!

   Parents call it "talking back" we call it explaining.

   Dear Nosey Friend, I know you're reading my inbox while You're "playing" with my phone.

   making the 6 Million Dollar Man sound effect as he runs.