Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   I've been social distancing from the gym for years

   I think we all need to be on the same page on this: are we telling kids that the Easter Bunny died of Corona Virus or that Carole Baskin killed him?

   Anyone else feel the love in here?

   If your blow up dolls nose starts running, she’s not sick she’s full.

   Trump will be re-elected.

   Lets send the coronavirus tiger to Carole Baskin

   True Christian values below. Wish death to everyone who disagrees with you. No wonder you people think Trump is holier than the Pope.

   To the below: Spoken like a true blue Christian, eh? You must make God so proud.

   We are the knights who say ‘Ni!

   Been on a new diet that seems to be working for me called "I better not eat too much as I'm trying to conserve what little toilet paper I have the hoards didn't get" diet.

   Corvidiot: Pronounced - Cor-v-idiot. Meaning - Someone who is a coronavirus incredibly stupid. Exceple 1 - Dude! Are you really go out to get coffee with friends? Exemple 1 - Look at the dude with 300 rolls of of toilet paper in his shopping!

   Aswe end week 2 of the lockdown, I wonder if OsamaBinLadin stuck in his house with 3 wives n kids decided to call in those Navy Seal himself

   I'm convinced that Florida ain't afraid of nothing....except flying roaches

   there wasn't a coronavirus until you mofos started making those brooms stand up by themselves

   Not only are parents finding out their kids can't read, the kids are finding out that their parents can't read either during this quarantine

   I want to lose weight but I don’t want to get caught up in one of those eat right and exercise scams

   Just thought I'd point out that if you're going around to different friends houses to make "Social Distancing" videos with you're missing the point.

   Since the medica frowns on using the term "Chinese virus" or "Kung Flu", please use the following instead: Wuhan Weezer, Boomer Doomer, or the Holocough.

   Since soap kills COVID 19, have you guys tried just eating Tide Pods again?

   While watching him give a speech on TV, I increased the brightness but it didn't work.