Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 411 of 6383
Remember when eating tide pods was considered crazy
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04-24-2020 06:20 by N.W
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In a world full of coronavirus I wanna be your sanitizer
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04-24-2020 02:51 by Olanlege
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Running out of ideas for entertainment. Thinking about asking the neighborhood to gather in the street 6' apart and do the Hokey Pokey. After all, that is what it's all about.
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04-23-2020 21:50 by Vaterpop
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Toxic people be like “Enjoy your day” after they just ruined it
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04-23-2020 21:25
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Sometimes people pretend you’re a bad person so they don’t feel guilty for the things they did to you.
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04-23-2020 21:22
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If your getting together with your 10 piece band to make a "Social Distancing Video" I think you've missed the point of social distancing.
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04-23-2020 20:11
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In a world full of coronavirus, I wanna be your sanitizer
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04-23-2020 18:28
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Think I'm starting to lose a little weight while one a new diet plan thats really working for me that's called the "Eat less so I don't have to go to the supermarket as often" diet plan.
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04-23-2020 13:13
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What you need to ask yourself is…
Do you really like pancakes and waffles? Or are they just a syrup delivery vehicle?
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04-23-2020 10:22
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Now would be an Ideal time for Netflix to release Sheldon Cooper presents Sheldon Cooper's "Fun With Flags"
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04-23-2020 09:28
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You're traveling thru another dimension. A dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of dough, ricotta and mozzarella. Your next stop, the Twilight Calzone.
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04-23-2020 08:29 by Fazzy
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Ladies, even in social distancing, men exaggerate. They'll claim it's six feet, but it's really only three.
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04-23-2020 08:27
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I married my wife for her good looks but not the ones she's been giving me lately.
Men try role reversal in bed, and you have a headache for once.
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04-22-2020 21:11 by STARMAN
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Don't kid your self would be a good name for a comdom.
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04-22-2020 21:07 by STARMAN
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"Nothing like a game of Twister, that's our motto." - Makers of IcyHot
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04-22-2020 18:34 by Fazzy
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My body absorbed so much hand sanitizer that when I pee it cleans the toilet...
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04-22-2020 17:13 by Gabe
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If a fart can get through underwear and a pair of jeans how can a mask made of cloth protect you from Corona?
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04-22-2020 16:53 by TheB
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.. If there was a liars hall of fame. He would be first person inducted.
What do you call a man who has everything?...... A bachelor.
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04-22-2020 15:02 by STARMAN
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