Reznor Funny Status Messages

   One of the best feelings in the world is when you hug someone you love and they pepper spray you.

   By the time a woman realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks shes wrong.

   What has 75 balls and screws little old ladies? Bingo

   When I was a kid, I remember trying to stay up all night until the sun came up was such a challenge and so cool. Now its almost a ritual and dreaded.

   I just read that having sex burns just as much calories as running 4 miles. Who the f@&k runs 4 miles in 30 seconds?

   My girlfriend wants something with lots of diamonds for Valentine's Day. She is going to love this deck of cards!

   I wish Google could tell me where my T.V. remote is right now.

   My wife and my girlfriend both said on their status that they are going to go live in Brazil for a few months. Is there something I should know about???????

   I am in the process of writing a new country song for someone special....... Its called "If I woulda shot you sooner, Id be outta prison by now."

   Just had sex with a Prostitute who had only one eye. Told her I might see her again. She said shed keep an eye out for me.

   Was just informed that Turkeys cant fly. Thats messed up! All those times hunting and I was looking up!!