Angela Funny Status Messages

   I just saw a message in my alphabet soup. It says OOOOOO. Oh wait….I'm eating Cheerios

   Solution to two of the world's problems: Feed the homeless to the hungry.

   God: An invisible friend for adults

   You shouldn't say anything mean about people who can't read. You should write it instead.

   it's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now sounds a little better than, it's 1:15, I'm trashed & horny...

   being a mother is like Hotel California, you can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave:S

   My night and shining armor, ending up being a retard in tin foil;)

   Random thought of the day: If someone threw a rock and knocked you off your donkey, would you be stoned off your ass?

   Says: He may wear the pants.. But I CONTROL The Zipper!! hehehe!

   What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery guy have in common? They can both smell it, but can't eat it!

   when the roomates away, in my underwear I will stay

   If the mini skirt gets any shorter...women will have two more lips to paint, two more cheeks to powder, & a little more hair to comb"

   's going on vacation and coming back on probation.

   My second favourite household chore is laundry. My first favourite is being hit in the head repeatedly by the ceiling fan blades until I faint.

   ...and then Buffy staked Edward. The end

   Irony: a fat guy at walmart getting his blood pressure checked with two big bags of doritos in his other hand:D

   Sometimes the thoughts in my head get bored, and go for a stroll out through my mouth. This is rarely a good thing.

   Are both your parents retarded? Because you seem very special?

   People say I have an attitude problem. I disagree. It's my attitude, but it's their problem!!!

   If it werent for the gutter my mind would be homeless!!!