Aaron Funny Status Messages

   I can't believe Google is c0cky enough to start guessing after one letter.

   "I bet if he could do that, he wouldn't be telling me to stop."... thought the Dog.

   When dressing up for Halloween, disguise the limit.

   The rules were already broken when I got here.

   I always hate when I miss out on wear your pajamas to Wal-Mart night.

   I better get to sleep. I have to get up early to call in sick to work.

   I am constantly washing my hands just in case I am required to deliver a baby in a broken elevator.

   Let's go some place were we can each be alone

   I wish I had a lower I.Q., so that I could enjoy your company.

   I heard that you changed your mind. So, what did you do with the diaper?

   Laying on my TV watching the couch. I needed to switch things up a bit.

   My face is sore from making my angry face all day.

   Might get my balls botoxed today.

   No one can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it.

   "Now, how's he gonna read that magazine all rolled up like that?"... thought the spider.

   Snuck a bunch of booze into work today using my stomach.

   I confine my exercise to jumping to conclusions, stretching the truth and pushing my luck.

   Today doesn't have that new day smell.

   For Halloween I'm going to be a 6. Who wants to be my 9?

   I would love to start working out, but I'm beefing up for my "before" picture.