trump Funny Status Messages

   I can't be the only one who is concernd about the White House burning down if all of Donald Trump's pants catch fire. Not only does he have a lot of pants, but they are yuuuuge pants.

   The Monk's "Nice Legs, Shame About your Face" is trump's favorite song about selecting a Senior Counselor for his administration ... and third wives.

   The hardest working position in the White House is Donald Trump's belt.

   Meatloaf's "Two out of Three Ain't Bad" is Trump's favorite song about what is the appropriate percentage of your wives who should be immigrants.

   Did Trump's physician say he would be the fittest President in history? If anything, he might be the fattest President in history.

   North Korea tests new rocket engine. Donald Trump phones Kim Jong-un and leaves stern voicemail stating, "Me no likey."

   Trump is now claiming, that his Perrier water is being tapped.

   It makes sense Tim Allen would support Trump considering he's a big fan of tools.

   Going from Barack Obama to Donald Trump is like replacing Captain James T. Kirk with Captain High Liner.

   Donald Trump's approval rating has dropped to 37%. Norman Bates scored higher with his mother.

   Ivanka Trump is getting an office in the West Wing. Too bad about her creepy coworker who just so happens to be her dad.

   In Trump's America, reading is for dummies. Watch more TV.

   Jerry Sandusky was trending this month and I thought Trump made him the head of the Family and Youth Services Bureau.

   Trump supporters like me are so poor, we have to create a g-mail account just so we can eat the spam.

   I'm not a fan of Donald Trump, but I won't denigrate those who are....and for those that are Donald Trump fans, denigrate means to put down.

   To be fair, Trump thinks Meals on Wheels is a taco truck and he hates Mexicans.

   So, the argument is that Trump said "wire tap" because he couldn't spell "surveillance"?

   If those terrible doctors hadn't given Trump those five deferments, we would have won Vietnam, bigly.

   BREAKING: Trump cancels annual Easter Egg Roll, claims he "doesn't care for Chinese food".

   Reagan had ketchup in school lunches declared a vegetable, so maybe Congress can have Trump declared a vegetable.