snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages

   Next person that asks me "Is it cold out?" after I walk inside with my winter coat on, gloves, hot and a red face is going to get thrown outside in the snow and locked out.

   Another WASTED DAY that the kids could be using to make up a snow day and a day I could be getting some stuff done , but damn near everything is closed.

   Sometimes while I drink my morning coffee I stare out the window think to myself "F#&k, thats a lot of snow!!"

   The next person that says asks me "Think we got enough snow?" shall be given an epic whitewash.

   We are in for such a cold winter this year that the squirrels are collecting more nuts than usual and so far 3 of my neighbors have disappeared, Are you all OK?

   while it's true that skinny girls freeze to death faster in the winter, it is also true that fat girls die alone.

   You see all this snow and complain, I see potential for filling my bathtub with it and chilling many beers for a party!

   If all this Global Warming keeps up, I think Atlanta may have to add to it's fleet of 8 snow-plows......

   Back in my day they never shut our school down for snow.. They just moved the school and made us walk further..

   snow on da ground, snow on da ground, lookin' like a fool with yo car spun around.

   This is pure snow! Do you know what the street value of this mountain is?!

   knockin' boots. Okay, maybe knockin' snow off my boots, but still.

   i like it when theres lots of snow on the road it gives the cops an excuse for me to be swerving all over the road when I'm drunk

   Since the snow stopped i've been skiing to work :-)

   Snow Tip: The other people out shoveling are called "neighbors." They are like Facebook friends who live nearby.

   Oh snap, I just dropped my cocaine in the snow. I'll never find it now.

   Everybody got snow blowers...Me all I got is man power a shovel.You wont see me in the gym gettin ready for Summer.

   Dear Winter, I am breaking up with you. It's not me, It's you, you make me miserable. I think it's time I start seeing other seasons. you wouldn't by chance have the phone number of your hot cousin Summer?

   You think you've got problems? I dropped my cocaine in the snow this morning.

   Today is the last day of fall. Raking leaves through this snow was a real pain today.