Boo Funny Status Messages

   No I do not want to see who deleted you from facebook in 2010.. And if you keep it up, I'm going to be first on the list for 2011..

   You have no idea how bad I want to write "Navidad" under the "For Lease" sign up the street!....Just Sayin...

   Screw your Four Loko... I've got a Dayquil with a 5hour energy and Grande Latte chaser with my name on it!... If you dont believe me, just ask my pet Unicorn

   Happy wife.. Happy life!

   #891... you didnt inbox me a number but I've always wanted to say this to you. Your depressing posts piss me off to no end! You need a haircut, I dont think he loves you anymore either, and I really dont give a Shi! what adorable trick your cat did today!

   And ps... you should'nt sing a song with an "s" in the title if you have a lithp!

   What do you call a pig with 3 eyes...??? A Piiig!...Stupid yes, but you know you'll tell it.

   I think They should make a Pregnancy app. You just pee on your phone and it tells you if you are pregnant. Your move apple!

   Would you tap that???..I wouldnt even poke it on facebook!!!!

   How does that old saying go.. Nice guys finish, In their hand?

   Facebook is the Hotel California of the new millennium. You can log out any time you like, but you can never leave.

   Rise and shine Billie Joe Armstrong... It's October!

   What did Curt Cobain say to Courtney Love before he died?... Holes gonna be big!

   what does a shingle and a fat chick have in common? They both get nailed by mexicans..

   What do you call a thousand armed lesbians?... Militia Ethridge!

   What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?.... Wipes his ass.

   It's My late night and I Forgot to bring my lunch and dinner to work with me. My "things I would do for a Klondike bar" list, is rapidly starting to grow!

   Ok, it's official...I spend way too much time on facebook. I just caught myself giving my boss a thumbs up because I liked something He said.. God help me!

   Sometimes, I just want to copy someone else's status word for word just to see if they would notice..

   You know you spend too much time on facebook when you start refering to people by their first, maiden, and last name!