Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 1724 of 6385
somewhere there a stoner watching the news hearing about Ebola & they ask "a bowl of what"
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10-18-2014 16:32 by Eddy
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FYI those little crosses along the interstate aren't for squirrel crucifixions. I was wrong.
Helen Keller wrote 12 books and I just put my shirt on inside out.
OK. The US is sending troops to West Africa to fight Ebola and humanitarian aid to the Middle East to fight ISIS. How the hell did we ever win two World Wars?
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10-18-2014 08:48
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When God closes a door, he opens a window. Our heating bill is outrageous and six raccoons got in last night. Please God, this has to stop.
Did You know if you unscramble 'Ebola Outbreak', it reads: We just want to scare you suckers like we did with Swine Flu, Bird Flu, Antharax, AIDS and high gas prices. Because scarring the public is what the government who created them is what they're go
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10-18-2014 00:17
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II have a strange feeling this year's "must have" Halloween costume will be a level 4 biohazard suit
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10-17-2014 21:33 by bradley
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American people are not evil people. If given the right information they will do the right thing. The problem lies with their lack of information/incorrect information. Robbin - I concur
It's only October 17th and I'm already sick of seeing anything regarding black friday .. seriously people have you no respect?? its african-american friday, dammit!
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10-17-2014 16:05 by Yaj
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Just once I’d like to see someone dropkick the guy grinning and waving behind the news reporter.
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10-17-2014 13:42
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All these Ebola deaths in Africa might explain why I haven't heard back from that Nigerian prince after I sent him my financial information.
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10-17-2014 11:49
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Michael Sam would have loved to go to Sayreville Highschool...
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10-17-2014 11:04
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If you're asking why there are no black folks in the movie Titanic. Who the hell do you think brought the luggages on board?
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10-17-2014 09:30
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"You know. If I had a son, he'd look like Hunter Biden and would do blow off a secretary's tramp stamp on a Naval base" ~ Barack Obama
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10-17-2014 09:01 by Michael
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Biden's son, another example of someone out douching their douchey parent
Biden's son booted off navy for positive cocaine test. Now he will run for office and win and deztroy sovereignty of nationz
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10-17-2014 06:06 by Sucks
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Everytime I see someone wearing camo, I run right into them. The I apologize profusely, claiming that I "didn't see them"
Uranus was the first planet discovered with a telescope. I didn't know planets had telescopes...
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10-17-2014 01:30 by JC
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Tell me more about this victum role you play due to the circumstances that you've created for yourself.
It was only after the other brothers of The Jackson 5 refused to let him join that little Samuel L. Jackson first became angry.