Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 1663 of 6384
2014 was a good year, unless you were a brother resisting arrest, pointing a toy gun, selling illegal smokes or beating your lady...
←Rate |
12-24-2014 09:09
Comments (0)
As punishment for hacking, Sony to send Justin Beiber on a North Korean tour.
←Rate |
12-24-2014 09:00
Comments (0)
They say whoever smelt it dealt it, so technically this weed is yours officer
←Rate |
12-24-2014 07:33 by dwells
Comments (0)
Attention Walmart shoppers... If you where on the bottom of the pyramid at cheer leading practice, you should not be wearing yoga pants. Thank You.
←Rate |
12-24-2014 06:56 by MrSki
Comments (0)
The Cosby Show. Where are they now? As far away from Billy Cosby as they can get. . .
←Rate |
12-24-2014 00:05 by JAB
Comments (0)
.Just found out former prez was hospitalized, was he covered by obamacare
←Rate |
12-24-2014 00:02
Comments (0)
A grown man should NOT know the names of the members of One Direction.....as I do.
←Rate |
12-23-2014 22:46
Comments (0)
Don't get too excited about Die-ins. They're not really dead! They're just acting like they can't take orders from police.
←Rate |
12-23-2014 21:58 by timk
Comments (0)
Just wanted to wish happy holidays to engineers of the electricals. Your postt manage to survive!
←Rate |
12-23-2014 16:07
Comments (0)
I made up a new drinking/card game. Its very simple to play, you simply draw a card and if its black you take a shot. Oh yeah, I call it Ferguson.
←Rate |
12-23-2014 15:47 by John Y
Comments (0)
I'm allergic to gluten free diets.
←Rate |
12-23-2014 15:46 by John Y
Comments (0)
I wonder if Patrick Swayze goes up behind people in pottery classes and hugs them just to make other ghost laugh.
←Rate |
12-23-2014 15:17
Comments (0)
Google has found that Ouija boards are one of this year's most popular toys. You know, because it wasn't bad enough dealing with your LIVING relatives...
←Rate |
12-23-2014 15:09 by Mark M
Comments (1)
Joyous Festivus to the rest of us. May your feats of strength be superior and your grievances be few.
←Rate |
12-23-2014 14:03
Comments (0)
For our next trick, we should hack into North Korea's TV system and put Jersey Shore on repeat...
←Rate |
12-23-2014 13:47 by eengrms
Comments (0)
I turned on my office light this morning....and boom....the news says North Korea has internet again, I don't think this is a coincidence
←Rate |
12-23-2014 13:10
Comments (0)
This time of year there is always that one house that has like 15 of those inflatable Christmas lawn decorations. In the daytime it looks like there was a drive by shooting at the North Pole with no survivors.
←Rate |
12-23-2014 12:38
Comments (0)
No thanks I am not drinking alcohol for now. I am saving myself for Christmas eve.
←Rate |
12-23-2014 12:13
Comments (0)
Today is the official day for guys to start Christmas shopping!!!!
←Rate |
12-23-2014 11:40
Comments (0)
You can assume that, for the next 2 weeks, there is Baileys in every cup of coffee I drink.