Danmanz Funny Status Messages

   They need to make some people's mouth like a cell phone plan. When their Mouth Minutes run out, they shut up for the rest of the month....until they pay to talk to you.

   If you're agruing with an idiot for more than a minute, then there will be two idiots.

   The media loves controlling this country. They promote NOT to drink & drive/text & drive but yet every third commercial its either about a car, a phone, or a alcoholic drink...and a little bit of insurance ads down your throat.

   True Story: People will believe you when start a story saying "True story"

   trust and friendship can be tested by how long a person borrows an item of yours for so long and return it back in the same condition.

   November 8th 2011: Call of Duty: MW3 + Alcohol + Women = A Night to Remember

   Forget about differences, let's talk about our similaritites. You ever wake up in the middle of the night, and you don't know what freakin' day it is?

   I'm glad people don't talk the way they spell, text, or type.

   You're always like a "deer in the headlights" when you look at the menu at Dairy Queen....You just don't know what to get.

   Try NOT. Do…or do not. There is no try. ~ Master Yoda (Star Wars)

   It's extraordinary when a person comes in contact with a spider web or a bug lands on them, they become a Kung-Fu master.

   Remembers the time when we memorized phone numbers of our friends, family, and spouses. Now we can't even remember our parents' numbers without looking down at the phone.

   You ever had a dream so damn good, you were pissed right after you woke up because you didn't want it to end....then you tried to go back to sleep to continue it but failed?

   Tough times don't last, but tough people do.

   Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I'll rememeber; involve me and I'll understand.

   it me or is majority of your high school friends more ‘Antisocial' these days on Facebook. Like we're all strangers or something…..No? Ok its not just me.

   Because we're all so offensive and opinionated, anything about politics, religion, race, current events, and alcohol will always get the most votes and comments.

   Hey John its your grandmother. Could you tell me how to work this cell phone you got me for Christmas? ~ Sent via payphone.

   It's funny...they leave the vault doors wide open in banks but somehow have those .50 cent pens chained to the tables.

   You always feel a sense of accomplishment when you finally get that food stuck between your teeth with your tongue....So get ready for Thanksgiving.