Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Submit a Status Message
Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Search Messages:
«Prev
«1
1242
1243
1244
1245
1246
1247
1248
1249
6452
Next»
Page: 1246 of 6452
Things I Joke About: 1) TV Shows/Movies. 2) Stuff I see on the internet. 3) 'That's what she said'. 4) Serious matters that should never be joked about and part of the reason I'm going to hell.
3
2
←Rate |
07-09-2016 14:27
Comments (
0
)
The female Praying Mantis devours the male immediately after mating ...... While a Human female prefers to spread it out over an entire lifetime.
5
7
←Rate |
07-09-2016 12:24
Comments (
0
)
I think my neighbors are beginning to suspect I'm not very good at gardening.
9
2
←Rate |
07-09-2016 12:21
Comments (
0
)
..... With so many things coming back in style ... I can't wait until Morality, Honesty and Loyalty become the new trend again.
10
2
←Rate |
07-09-2016 12:18
Comments (
0
)
I still think Richard Gere overpaid for Julia Roberts.
19
4
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:59
Comments (
0
)
I want to be so rich I can build my own water park. Filled with vodka.
4
3
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:42
Comments (
0
)
Would love to know what gross pizza joint the Ninja Turtles ordered from that they never questioned delivery to a sewer.
6
5
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:26
Comments (
0
)
The easiest way to childproof your house is to wear a condom.
10
2
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:22
Comments (
0
)
5 Word Eulogy: He loved texting and driving.
5
4
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:13
Comments (
0
)
It's Official: Both Hillary and Donald are now more unpopular than wearing Crocs with socks.
34
6
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:11
Comments (
0
)
Somedays I have the most intense on and off relationship with my pants.
3
3
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:09
Comments (
0
)
If I comment on a Facebook post I immediately hit "Turn Off Notifications" because why the hell wouldn't you?
5
1
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:04
Comments (
0
)
Happy endings run rampant in Disney Princess prostitution ring.
2
2
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:02
Comments (
0
)
Pro Tip: Taking photos inside a Victoria's Secret to make your own catalog is frowned upon by their management.
8
2
←Rate |
07-09-2016 05:00
Comments (
0
)
There are no skeletons in the closet. However, there is a tiny box of souls in the underwear drawer.
2
3
←Rate |
07-09-2016 03:51
Comments (
0
)
If we can't put aside our differences in an interracial porn section what hope do we have for the real world?
4
2
←Rate |
07-09-2016 02:32
Comments (
0
)
Starbucks is going to raise their prices by 10%. Doesn't affect me because if I'm paying over three bucks for a drink, it's always gonna be beer.
14
3
←Rate |
07-09-2016 02:30
Comments (
0
)
If anyone called me a tough cookie I would be so insulted because tough cookies are the absolute worse.
3
3
←Rate |
07-09-2016 02:28
Comments (
0
)
Just want to hang out with my friends, regardless of race, and make fun of idiots....regardless of race.
32
6
←Rate |
07-09-2016 02:25
Comments (
0
)
Remember when people had to entertain themselves on the toilet with a rotary phone.
8
2
←Rate |
07-09-2016 02:23
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
1242
1243
1244
1245
1246
1247
1248
1249
6452
Next»
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com