Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   will Hurricane Matthew be followed by hurricanes Mark, Luke & John?

   So where are all the Clown Rights groups? #ClownLivesMatter

   Someone needs to ask Hillary and Donald what they are planing to do about this growing and serious Clown Crisis?

   Thousands of Clown sightings all across the Nation, The candidates running for President. Yes, this is clearly and definitely ... The Year of the Clown.

   PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: If you are attacked by a mob of Clowns ... Go for the Juggler.

   CNN Just announced that Hillary won the next Debate.

   set fire to the preacher who is promising us hell

   Girls say they want a guy who is funny and spontaneous, but when I tap on the window at night dressed as a clown they’re all screaming.

   it just me or are there a whole lot of folks who get that stupid prompt to download the latest apple itunes and quicktime update 5 times a week??

   I want to be something really scary for Halloween. So, for this year, I'm dressing up as 3% phone battery.

   Can't wait til this election travesty is over so we can all get back to disliking each other for reasons other than poor political choices.

   All I’m saying is now might be a good time to check the Paris pawn shops for some good deals on jewelry.

   The opening question of the VP Debate was basically if you were Kiefer Sutherland do you think you'd make a great Designated Survivor?

   Clown Lives Matter

   You can teach a pet dog to go fetch your paper...a pet cat will teach you to go F@#K yourself.

   Some of you ladies need to ease up on the makeup until we get this clown situation resolved.

   I'm going to write a book of inspirational quotes & then I'm going to jump off a bridge because I want my readers to be thoroughly confused.

   Don't stand up for the national anthem = USA hater. Don't stand up & pay taxes to support the national infrastructure = genius businessman?

   Obama loves the Poor so much that he created Millions more.

   I find it interesting that the same people that are telling me that Donald Trump would be a bad President are the same people who told us that Barack Obama would be a Good President!!!