Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon All I'm sayin is how do you expect your gluteus to be maximus,,, if you don't eat your bacon?
←Rate | 11-12-2016 09:29 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey protesters, while you're marching for equality for something that hasn't even happened yet, why don't you march on over the ND where Native American rights have been getting violated for over a year? Oh, it doesn't affect you. Got it.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 09:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My favorite dinosaurs were the carbivores... You never hear about them because they went extinct before the others,,, You know cuz,, like all the gluten and such...
←Rate | 11-12-2016 08:53 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon In these trying times, I want to find good in this world so here goes,,,,, I am extremely grateful that Cap'n Crunch leaves far more gently than it enters.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 08:48 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wtf? I like something and the site reverts back to page 1!
←Rate | 11-12-2016 08:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just introduced a guy wearing a hoodie with shorts, to a guy wearing a vest... They're fighting... Umm Wait,, That's actually making out, they're making out.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 08:34 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hot Kraft singles in your area are difficult to open, and really not good cheese anyway,,,, So....
←Rate | 11-12-2016 08:30 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Me: But God, where did the second set of footprints go?.. God: That's when you were dating that psycho. I wasn't sticking around for that.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 08:28 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon BREAKING- the only way Trump is not your president is if you move to another country. See ya! Don't let the Wall hit you on the way out.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 08:13 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Meanwhile Mexico is digging through its couch looking for change to pay for the wall......
←Rate | 11-12-2016 06:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The so called bullied became the bullies and are now bullying America because of one bully? What's next groping?
←Rate | 11-12-2016 05:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm a simple man, I see titties I click
←Rate | 11-12-2016 05:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So is every room in a Trump hotel now a presidential suite?
←Rate | 11-12-2016 04:46 by iceqube Comments (0)  


   messageicon I doubt most of these rioters even remember all of the amazing riots and protest violence that happened when President Obama was elected President ..... Oh wait ... there weren't any .... Ever.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 02:30 Comments (1)  


   messageicon WOW, I had no Idea there were so many temper tantrum prone clueless spoiled little brats in America.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 02:26 Comments (1)  


   messageicon I think before people are allowed to protest and try to overturn an election, The protesters should first be required to take a basic Civics 101 class.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 02:14 Comments (1)  


   messageicon How policies suddenly change once you get elected: We gonna keep the Obamacare and we gonna legalize some undocumented immigrants. Yes you gonna get the change that you voted for.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 02:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's time for a Civil war to overthrow the legal government to install the leader demanded by the mob. Ya ... That's the ticket.
←Rate | 11-12-2016 02:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So glad republicans don't ever riot or protest. They have guns but they also have respect for democracy
←Rate | 11-12-2016 01:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon America...the land of the dumbs.
←Rate | 11-11-2016 23:54 Comments (0)  




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