BEGO Funny Status Messages

   So you gonna take 15 minutes to text back huh? That's fine, I'll take 20...

   They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder...should we give that a try?

   Lies usually spread faster than the truth because there are always damn more of them.

   I laugh when someone I just met gets mad at me and expects me to care. Like, wtf. I don't give a s**t about you! I don't even know you!

   The later it gets at night, the funnier everything is. When you're laughing at nothing...it's time to go to bed.

   I don't need damn a brain, I have google.

   Prvo me upoznaj pa mi onda sudi, a ne po tome što pričaju ljudi ! :)

   If all men are the same, why do women take so long to choose one ?

   there a national do-not-call list for friends and family yet?

   Life gets a lot easier once you decide to become part of the problem.

   I must say you really have an open mind. And a mouth to match

   Today someone asked me how I would react if someone jumped off a bridge. I laughed and said,"depends on who it is that jumped!!"

   Open Google Maps (Get Directions) 2: Type China as your starting point 3: Type Taiwan as your destination. 4: Read step 48

   My doctor e-mailed me asking if I knew my “blod group”. I replied, “typo.”

   Why does everyone say my name like it means “Shut Up”?

   Love is not about how much you say "I love you", but how much you can prove that it's true.

   You say you hate him but you constantly think of him, re-read his messages & check his FB profile.

   If two past lovers remain friends, it`s either someone is still in love, or someone is still hoping for a second chance.

   If the government fails to raise the debt ceiling and stops paying their bills, I will stop paying mine, fair is fair

   Man with one foot on 'yesterday' and one foot on 'tomorrow' will end up pissing on 'today'.