BEGO Funny Status Messages

   The wrong relationship will have you feeling more alone than when you were single..

   You can look at some people and instantly know they're only going to get two awards in life, a birth and a death certificate.

   LIKE IF you hate when you're listening to the radio, and every radio station is on commercial.

   If ‘real life' was really that great, Facebook wouldn't be so darn addictive.

   It's difficult to have a committed relationship with a schizophrenic. They're always seeing other people.

   My parents used to be happy when I took naps… but now they think I'm lazy.

   Facebook is a like real life in that I don't think of the witty reply until 5 or 6 days after the conversation happened.

   Facebook = Heavily populated city. Twitter = Just a vacation spot. Myspace = A ghost town.

   Life is like Facebook. People will LIKE your problems & comment, but no one will solve them because everyone is busy updating theirs.

   You know a girl just broke up with her boyfriend when she starts putting a million quotes on Facebook.

   Facebook says we're 'friends' but, trust me, I wouldn't hesitate to punch you in the face.

   A teenager is always lazy to hold a pencil and write but never too lazy to hold a cell phone and type..

   You may think I'm a loser, but to my goldfich, I'm the god of flakes.

   When I say "I won't tell anyone", my best friend doesn't count.

   Face your damn problems. Don't Facebook your problems.

   The biggest lie on Facebook: 'status offline'

   The only obstacle to following my dreams is the alarm clock...

   Occasionally, I like to take a look through my old status updates and smile smugly at my sparkling wit.

   Sorting out your Facebook friends list? Change the date of your birthday and anyone who wishes you happy birthday, delete!

   Life's cruel when you think it is, life's happy when you feel it is, and life's best when you enjoy it as it is.