Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Freedom of Speech has returned to America .... Apparently it is finally now legal once again to make fun of our President after 8 long years.
←Rate | 01-20-2017 11:19 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I guess orange is officially the new black
←Rate | 01-20-2017 10:02 by cpaman Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd be all for the Women's March protest if they added, "off a cliff" to the name of the event.
←Rate | 01-20-2017 07:47 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've been taught to think before I act so if I ever slap the $h!t out of you, I've thought about it and I'm confident about my decision.
←Rate | 01-20-2017 07:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Too bad these communist Russians cannot hack their economy and make it great.
←Rate | 01-19-2017 23:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Anyone caught Rioting on Inauguration Day should lose their Welfare Benefits. Oh, and their Obama Phones too.
←Rate | 01-19-2017 23:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know what I like about Politicians? ..... When they leave office. Heck, they're just like Diapers ... they need to be changed .... AND often!!!
←Rate | 01-19-2017 23:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Presidents come and go, the pendulum swings back and forth ... America is 259 years old .... it has happened many times and we are still here ... so just Chill
←Rate | 01-19-2017 22:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Can I safely look at a picture of the sun on my phone? I know you not suppose to look at the sun, but how about a picture?" - My wife
←Rate | 01-19-2017 22:38 by Jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon CONGRATS PRESIDENT OBAMA. You are truly a milestone. First president in our history to be at war for his WHOLE TERM. Great way to earn that Nobel Peace Prize.
←Rate | 01-19-2017 22:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What do I like most about people? Their dogs....
←Rate | 01-19-2017 21:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just ate a whole jar of expired mayonnaise!
←Rate | 01-19-2017 20:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Circus shuts down..Obama leaves office... Coincidence? I think not
←Rate | 01-19-2017 20:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy Trumpmas Eve!
←Rate | 01-19-2017 17:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today, my president is black. Tomorrow, my president is orange. I guess orange really is the new black
←Rate | 01-19-2017 16:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the Russians Hacked the election system .... Wouldn't it be the candidate with the Most votes/Popular vote that the Russians were supporting?
←Rate | 01-19-2017 13:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ya know, that damn commercial lies! I spent 3 hrs yelling out my window "Its MY money and I want it now!!" Only thing I got was ticket for disturbing the peace!
←Rate | 01-19-2017 13:16 by Jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon TODAY IS THE DAY OF ST. JUDE THADDEUS, PATRON SAINT OF IMPOSSIBLE CAUSES. If our new President ever needed all the help in the universe in straightening out the mess of the past 8 years, this Saint is the one.
←Rate | 01-19-2017 11:08 by Holy Moly! Comments (1)  


   messageicon If you're constantly sharing old memories on Facebook, does that mean you can't let go of your past?
←Rate | 01-19-2017 09:40 by TJI Comments (0)  


   messageicon All Slip and Fall classes will be cancelled after the Inauguration.
←Rate | 01-19-2017 09:29 by Moulon Yon Comments (0)  




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