mtravica Funny Status Messages

   it was a JOKE that I had my status as female on facebook....i have changed that...now can people please stop calling me "chicky babe"

   dont ask me about anything thats about to happen last year

   why do people keep asking dogs "whos a good boy then". My dog told me he thinks the question is patronizing.

   watching a cooking show full of dumb hosts and arrogant chefs. Yes, I think they should all try the smelly sauerkraut water - and choke to death.

   i love it when I get tailgated on a bumpy road and the driver behind me has no time to avoid the really big pothole that takes away his body kit.

   Im good at peeling potatoes and my cooking is terrible. I have always dreamed of working in a prison kitchen.

   i dont mind walking past bushes alone on a dark night. What I do mind is when people start jumping out of them

   eating chocolate+ shooting singing cats with my water gun= happiness

   the guy that drives behind me normally chewing his finger was eating a pizza this morning. I was curious to find out the topping so I hit the brakes suddenly. It was pineapple and ham

   FEMALE SHOP assistants. When a car mechanic comes to your till, add on a selection of random items they didn't know they needed, and charge them $50 labour costs for the transaction.

   Elderly drivers. Pressing the pedal on the right will make your car go a little faster. Forget all that rubbish about suffocating at speeds above 20 kmh. It was all a myth.

   this is just a temporary status...until I think of something better

   middle of the night and in my boring backyard. No gold to dig up and no dead bodies to bury...sigh

   My neighbor is sleeping off his hangover on my front lawn again. I think he needs another drink.

   I completed one push up without stopping. Normally I go half way then take a break

   its midnight and theres a party next door. I dont know what to bring. I think I'll bring my lawnmower

   My update for the week. See you next week.

   I'm wearing the boxer shorts with the little hearts all over them tonight.... It's probably not a good night to go to jail...