Gator Funny Status Messages

   bringing sexy back. after a long court battle I got full custody

   Hey guys. Everybody. let's all give Santa a break this year.......Be naughty.

   had a wonderful day. Unfortunately, this wasn't it.

   sometimes feels like a booger on the dashboard of life

   If I was on death row and given one last meal I would ask for a fortune cookie. "Come on 'long prosperous life!'"

   Be nice to your laptop/smartphone today. SkyNet was supposed to become self-aware last night, April 19th 2011. If all goes well we can avoid Judgement Day tomorrow.

   If I was the Director of NASA, I would make all of the ground crew dress up as Apes when the space shuttle Atlantis lands just to screw with them....now that would make a good movie...

   I'm going to McDonald's for breakfast and ordering an Egg McMuffin and a McChicken, just to see which one comes first.

   Not trying to brag or make anyone jealous, but I can still fit in the same sized gloves I wore in high school...

   Bedtime Tip: Ring the doorbell on your way to bed at night...this will clear the dogs off your bed long enough for you to get in and get comfortable...

   I hate it when TV shows say "Adult Content" but then don't show anyone going to work, paying their bills or cleaning up after the kids...