DudeSays Funny Status Messages

   I have tonight off so if anyone’s free let’s go somewhere and look at our phones together.

   I just told my brother he was adopted, his response was, “At least they picked me”

   It’s sad when a girl breaks up and changes back to her “I need attention” Facebook picture.

   It’s amazing how many people are allergic to gluten, peanuts, and facts.

   I want the equivalent of an e-cigarette for alcohol so I can do it at work. Get on that scientists!