Aj Funny Status Messages

   In a Relationship w/ Friday. "I'm really happy to see you again, you know how much I love you and miss you. Although we only see each other once a week, you never fail to make me happy. What I really like the most about you is that UNLIKE GIRLS, you don't

   YES!!! I knew it... The world will not end in 2012 - I just found a condom in my wallet that expires in 2013.

   Seriously, someone needs to invent snacks in bags that don't make noise when you open them late at night.

   Seriously, I put seriously at the beginning of the sentence to make me sound more serious even when I'm not.

   Dear Santa, please let me take a look of your good girls gone bad list.

   If you havent practice your alibi in front of the mirror, you haven't been in-love.

   Apparently, it is nearly impossible for men to beat a women in any argument, because men have a need to make sense.

   Some things are meant to be just once in a life time. -Sincerely, One Night Stand

   Jesus take the wheel, I'm updating my status.

   wondering why facebook bothers to give us the option of "It's Complicated" in a relationship status. Aren't all relationships complicated because girls are complicated by nature?

   Every time I found something to eat in the refrigerator, I feel like I found a treasure.

   About the Facebook IPO...want to get rich..(ofcourse ye do..!!)..here is the plan.. 1)Wait for the IPO.. 2)Expect a big buying fury...making the stock to spiral upwards.. 3)wait... 4)Then lets all of us..yes..all 800odd million of us not visit Facebook fo

   Headline in the paper: "Woman beats off rapist!" Well, that was probably a fair trade anyway.

   What did the firefighter at Paul Walker's crime scene say first " Well Ladies & Gentlemen, Mr. Walker is still one of the hottest guys in Hollywood "

   Chocolate, candy and flowers def got her in the mood until she asked me where I got the pretty roses from.. I guess the Cemetery after work was not a good answer \ :O /