@iJokes_ Funny Status Messages

   You know your Twitter timeline is boring when you get unfollowed by a spambot.

   Disney's now letting its theme park employees grow beards. I don't know... I think some kids might get freaked out by Snow White's new goatee.

   A study found that 40% of Tweets can be categorized as pointless babble... while the other 60% is serious commentary on Justin Bieber's hair.

   A woman recently fell off a pier while texting. Don't worry; she's OK. Before she hit the water, she was able to Google "how to swim."

   A friend sticks with you through thick and thin. A best friend tells you if your butt's getting thick.

   Attention, stoners: No, you don't qualify for medical marijuana just because you smoked a blunt and beat your roommates in Operation.

   I love watching Justin Bieber; it's like toddlers in tiara's mixed with Vh1's behind the music except live. Can't wait till we get to the drug addiction part.

   Nicki Minaj shut down her twitter account saying “A voice in my head told me to delete my Twitter and that's what I did,”Can that same voice tell Justin Bieber to do it also..

   The internet is a great place to turn strangers into enemies.