moon Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Love how I can remember the lyrics to just about any song written in the 70s but can't remember where I laid my car keys down last night?
←Rate | 08-30-2020 19:35 by moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm so old I just sit around and look at Facebook all day.... like younger people do nowadays.
←Rate | 09-12-2020 22:25 by moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon My doctor says I need to cut back on my gluten. Over my bread body!
←Rate | 09-16-2020 00:51 by moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who make their cars come to a complete halt on top of a railroad tracks to look both ways to see if a train is coming need to stop!....I mean go!
←Rate | 09-30-2020 12:39 by moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd really like to get personalized license plates for my car but they're so expensive I decided to change my name to XJS-3582
←Rate | 10-09-2020 02:46 by moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm beginning to believe whoever said "Hindsight is 2020" was sending a message to the future we all misunderstood.
←Rate | 10-23-2020 21:32 by moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can always tell when a friend spent a lot on their kitchen remodel when I can't find their garbage can.
←Rate | 10-26-2020 00:31 by moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you drop a cookie on the floor and bend down to pick it up does that count as a squat?
←Rate | 10-28-2020 12:54 by moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm so glad the elections are over and we can put all that stress behind us and move on to being stessed about the holidays.
←Rate | 11-08-2020 10:30 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who am I sad passed away? Anwer: Alex Trebek.
←Rate | 11-09-2020 16:50 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I put the thingamajig in the whatchamacallit and turned doohickey and wuteveritis still doesn't work. Any ideas?
←Rate | 11-12-2020 23:18 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can predict the future, for example, sıɥʇ pɐǝɹ oʇ sʎɐʍǝpıs pɐǝɥ ɹnoʎ uɹnʇ pןnoʍ noʎ ʍǝuʞ I
←Rate | 11-19-2020 01:22 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife asked me to put up a canopy with bright lights. I told her now is the winter of our disco tent.
←Rate | 12-08-2020 19:40 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Good newsh, I'm shurvivfing the dentisht wivout any notishable shide affecshss!
←Rate | 12-12-2020 20:25 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Think I've been staying home isolating for too long as I just watched a Hallmark holiday Christmas movie in its entirety and I actually thought it wasn't corny.
←Rate | 12-15-2020 12:38 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon You may say I'm a dreamer But I'm not the only one......but think the odds of winning the HGTV Dream Home are pretty good.
←Rate | 12-17-2020 12:01 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Walking In a Wonderland" is a great Christmas song for Southerners to keep in mind since they don't know how to drive in it.
←Rate | 12-19-2020 09:59 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you drive an old air-cooled Volkswagen a essential oil is dw40.
←Rate | 12-19-2020 19:41 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you know that the sentence "Are you as bored as I am" can be read backwards and still makes sense?
←Rate | 12-21-2020 16:20 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't forget to wave smile and wish your neighbors a Merry Christmas who are kind like Facebook friends you might not really know either, but live closer.
←Rate | 12-23-2020 11:01 by Moon Comments (0)  




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