Eaglet1122 Funny Status Messages

   Just treated my nostrils to a Brazilian!!

   I was tickling a toad on his right flipper! Frog giggles amuse me!

   With soaring gas prices and my abnormally sized feet, I am thinking that I will be Yabba-dabba-dooing it to work this week!

   enjoying the sounds of a 2 year old having a meltdown...so soothing

   John Wayne Toilet Tissue: It's Rough - It's Tough And It Don't Take Crap Off Anyone

   "Step one: Cut a hole in the box!"

   I don't get this hole poking thing.

   I spend 500% of my life exaggerating!

   I want to be famous and make a cure that saves tens of people!

   Find your little island of "OK" in a vast sea of "Holy crap!"

   I do feel that it is appropriate for us all to get on our knees and thank the good Lord that spiders do not fly.

   New condom slogan...."Wrap it in latex or give her your paychex."

   Hit "Like" if you're tired of everyone on Facebook telling you to hit "Like."

   50 Shades of Grey..Girls can't wait to read it and Guys can't wait for the movie!

   Hey someone tell the Sun to stop showing off!!

   Thanks to all you that could join my FLASH MOB in London. WE DID IT!!!

   When are these Olympic nuts gonna get it? Hot chicks, in bikinis, jumping on trampolines. The perfect opening ceremony. It can be applied to half time shows too.

   Wonder what events al-Qaeda will be participating in.

   The women's US gymnastics team is awesome! I have never seen more beautiful floor exercises, high bars or labia majora in my life.

   Does Roseetta Stone work? I want to learn to speak Mexican!