g0re Funny Status Messages

   Girls just want to have funds.

   When you're driving illegally, suddenly every car is an undercover cop.

   When someone posts pictures of a dance or something, you always look through them to see if you are in the background.

   Because of the constant rubbing of tectonic plates, the earth has volcanic ejaculations.

   Sometimes you just need someone to tell you you're not a loser and are worth a little more than crap.

   Dreams: are always getting to the best part, and then you wake up.

   You know when you have to wash the dishes when you are eating salad out of a coffee cup.

   It sucks when you make a really awesome post but then someone steals your glory with an even better comment.

   There's that moment of awesome when you get an A on the test... and then you realize you were given someone elses' test...

   I'm pretty sure Dora the Explorer is teaching kids the wrong idea, because I tried rapist no raping the other day…. It didn't go well.

   Guys: boobs are like Wendy's; "You know when it's real,"

   Female gamers need to get off their high horse. There are a million girls who like gaming, and it doesn't make them "special" or "cool". It just makes them a girl who happens to like video games.

   Ugly People: There's only so much that photoshop can do.

   You know you need sleep when you feel drunk without having actually had any alcohol.

   I'd like to live forever, if only cuz I am curious as to how the course of human history will play out: the probably drastically new technology in the far future, the rise and fall of new countries development of government, humans rights, literature, etc

   Hallmark movies give un-attractive, single girls false hope.

   easy but criticizing gently on it shows the mark of a sensible personality.

   You can never think of any changes or improvements to your essay until AFTER you print it out.

   Realizing that you aren't that smart after all is a sign of maturity.

   Women are like condoms; if they're not on your d!ck, they're in your wallet.