"new york" Funny Status Messages

   93% of men in the 1930s ate their lunch while sitting on the edge of scaffolding at the top of unfinished skyscrapers in New York city.

   Too bad the Coronavirus doesn't act like elections. Mostly those who'll get it are in New York and California.

   Fun Fact: In New York City it’s a Class A felony for a pizzeria to run out of pepperoni.

   The MSM claims national polls have Biden ahead by 14 points. By "national", they mean New York City, Chicago, Philadelphia, Los Angeles and cemeteries.

   I was on the phone earlier with a friend in upstate New York. We touched on the weather. She said, "It's wet, gloomy and mostly in the 40's. I said that sounds like my sƐx life.

   I’m what the New York Times once referred to as “an acquired taste…like bleach.”

   Hey, guess what me and Rudy Giuliani have in common? We both can't practice law in New York.

   A New York plastic surgeon has announced that he is creating “vacation breasts,” which are implants that would last two to three weeks. That’s amazing, isn’t it? Who gets a three-week vacation?

   Flooding in the Carolinas is God's wrath on New York/New Jersey transplants for thinking they can assimilate with hillbillies.