Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   "an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, nestled in a sesame seed bun of mystery."

   wondering how she can go forward when she doesn't know which way she's facing

   catching pokemon

   rejecting your reality and substituting his own.

   leaving your mouth with a great clean feeling

   may not be Fred Flintstone but I can still make your bedrock

   on your mind at this very moment

   having zero tolerance for the lactose intolerant

   doin it and doin it and doin it well

   a Jedi. Obviously.

   not suitable for minors!

   facing the book

   following the yellow brick road

   running with scissors!

   has just finished installing a flux compacitor in his DeLorean and is headed back to 1985

   under your bed

   the reason the chicken crossed the road...

   "Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore, when you can just pick them up off the beach for free?"

   "If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?"

   please don't follow in my footsteps coz I walk into walls