Yaj Funny Status Messages

   having an out of money experience

   thinks that the US Soccer team should dress up as oral hygienists to scare the english into forfeiture

   is gonna go to a psychiatrists office, sit in the waiting room and just stare at people..

   thinks there will be a lot of upset strippers tonight . . . Brazil lost

   ya ever notcie that the most comfortable one can be in bed is always one minute before you have to get up?

   "Vegeterian" is American Indian for 'Bad Hunter'

   when I smash a bug on the wall or ceiling I like to keep it there as a warning to the others..

   doesn't get why everyone blames the craziness on the "full moon".. the moon is ALWAYS there, you just dont see it all the time

   girl, your pants are so tight, I could read your lips!

   noticed that ever since Susan Boyle confessed her virginity to the world, the Taliban and Al Qaeda have cut back on suicide bombing, knowing now what lies ahead for them.

   you know you're getting older when your back goes out more than you do

   wants to put handcuffs on, run into a hardware store in a panic and ask for a hacksaw

   brought my date a footlong sub thinking it would score me major points, but apparently I went to the wrong jared . . .

   thinks people with parkinsons just have a good song stuck in their head

   says change your birthday on facebook to todays date, and see how many of your "friends" are totally clueless

   Really? Snooki is going to be IN the ball as it descends on NYE?!? And the cast of the Jersey Shore will lead a fist pump? Does Al Qaeda have a request line??

   an apathetic sociopath - I'd kill you if I cared.

   take my advice; I don't use it anyway.

   never forget the 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

   's words to live by: Treat everyone you meet with dignity and respect but always have a plan to kill them.