Seanathon Funny Status Messages

   Its daylight saving time again people.. An you know what that means.. Playing another week of “Well it should really be this time instead of that time"We get it! Happens twice a year!

   The Game Angry Birds... Should really change its name to Angry People!

   People now a days throw the word love around like its a goddamn frisbee! How are you going to start dating someone and 4 days later post how much you love them? B!tch you dont even know them!

   If I wanted your opinion...I'd ask you to fill out the neccesary forms!

   Apparently Facebook is now Rated...NC-17?!

   A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunch time. She said 'sorry about the wait.' I said, 'Don't worry, you'll find a way to lose it eventually '

   You know your getting old, when you start changing your grammer in texts..you know "goin' - going, neva-never, ax-ask.

   I wonder if people, who actually think they can danceq.. Have ever watched themselves dance in front of the mirror naked... I bet their minds would change in a heartbeat!

   I'm kind of scared about what the future is going to bring...Pretty soon were all going to have microchips inplanted in our heads...We'll be able to take and upload pictures just by a blink of an eye.

   F*CK! I think I need to put the booze down...Ive been cookin this damn turkey for 450 minutes at 15 degrees... When do I rotate it?!

   People who buy real Christmas Trees the day after Thanksgiving need some serious help...And if you have your tree up already...You should probably seek medical attention..

   s I think they should leagalize p0t for teachers.. Think about it.. It eliminates them drinkin on the job.. It would make classes a lot more interesting, and people may actually wana stay in school.

   Don't You know what they say about Martini's?....Martini's are like T!tt!es.. 1's not enough and 3 too many!

   I've learned a lot from women...Especially how to get out of a speeding ticket..Like crying for instance... It just doesnt work for women... Totally freaks the pol!ce out seein a man cry

   Don't call me son unless you're going to include me in your will.

   Dont you just love my t!tt!es? (+ )(- ).. Its just a tit bit nipply in here!

   Talk is cheap... Thats why everyone can afford to talk so much sh!t!

   Omg.. Why does Lady Gaga look like a skeleton.. Jesus! Its almost Christmas! B!tch is bout 2 months behind!

   Please hurry up with your story.. That I care absolutely nothing about... I'm afraid if I keep this fake smile on my face any longer, its guna get stuck this way.

   Just because I liked your status... Doesnt mean you have to like mine 2 seconds after... Didnt know you liked the idea of me sittin on the toliet..