bego Funny Status Messages

   Your parents payed your iPhone, MacBook and bought you car? And they're paying for your school? Please, tell me how hard your life is.

   Some guy screwed you over? Would you like to explain how the whole male population is responsible for this?

   Nutella...the only reason I buy bread.

   Feeling Ugly...go hang out in Wal-Mart for a few hours.

   When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. Now I’m beginning to believe it

   i swear; when people are in love they are never themselves, they are something else....

   No matter how long you have been together, it's completely okay to walk out of someone's life if you just don't feel like you belong there anymore.

   7 billion people, 14 billion faces.

   A Mosquito landed on my friends face.. Easiest decision of my life..

   They say milk gives you strenght so I drank 5 glasses and still couldnt move a wall, I tried 13 shots of vodka and saw the wall move by itself.

   Thinking that girl was special, then you realized that she's like that with everyone.

   Taking awful cold medicine as a kid taught me how to take shots in college.

   LIL KIM IS STILL ALIVE?

   People who squirt Ketchup all over their fries instead of dipping them are not people you want in your life.

   Why do people in movies keep all their lights off when they hear a noise? I’d be lighting that place up like friggin’ Times Square.

   2014 is in 4 months.. Let that sink in

   Does anyone else have a plastic bag full of plastic bags in their house, or is it just me?

   Basically the whole point of Facebook is so you can see if you’re prettier than your ex’s new girlfriend.

   Me: I cleaned all the dishes Mom: aren’t you going to put them away too? Me: you have to upgrade from the trial version to the full version

   Missing someone has been proven to cause insomnia. Being frustrated because you’re without that special someone keeps you awake.