love Funny Status Messages

   I just want to say how much I love my wife's inner beauty, core values, and soul. JK, she's smoking hot and loves to fcuk!!

   Get back here you stupid b*tch so that I can love you.

   Paul Revere had a time capsule. They opened it up after a couple of hundred years, and guess what they found? A stack of love letters from Barbara Walters..

   I would love to put all the girls I slept with in one room to see if they can figure out what they all had in common

   "When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace."

   Consultants know 243 ways to make love and know no member of the opposite sex

   I love you like white folks love the Kardashians.

   just avoid love at all costs

   I love animals. Especially with ketchup.

   I'm asian but not "love you long time" asian. More like "love you for 10 min, roll over, and go to bed" asian.

   What Meatloaf wouldn't do for love I would probably do for a six pack.

   I love you like drunk people love EVERYTHING and EVERYBODY

   I love asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because I'm still looking for ideas.

   It's always so awkward ending phone calls with loved ones, I always say "I love you" and they're like, "thank you for choosing domino's"

   Just texted my wife "goodnight sweetheart, I love you" but accidentaly sent it to my boss, which is awkward because he likes to hold my hand in meetings.

   Looking for true love on Tinder is like looking for a Buffalo Bills championship. Good luck.

   I wish I loved anything as much as fat chicks love to tell people that Marilyn Monroe was a size 12.

   I’m about to eat gas station breakfast.....tell my family that I love them.

   You said you love spending time with your children. School Snow Days determined that was a lie.

   Step ladders are just like regular ladders except they don't love you as much.