moon Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon 2022 is going to be my year, I can just feel it!
←Rate | 12-29-2020 22:07 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy 2021 New Year to all of you who will be staying home in your pajamas eating snacks on New Year's Eve, just like any other year.
←Rate | 12-31-2020 14:14 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why should I trust the toothpaste recommended by 4 out of 5 dentists when they're the ones who make money fixing people's teeth?
←Rate | 01-02-2021 16:33 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you are ever wondering who your real friends are, delete your Facebook account and see who calls.
←Rate | 01-04-2021 01:34 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon In the summer it was to hot outside now it's to cold outside to take the Christmas lights down.
←Rate | 01-05-2021 11:12 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon For Sale. Slightly used Christmas tree. Prefer to do socially distance exchange and will place in front of house for you pickup. Leave money in neighbor's mailbox.
←Rate | 01-06-2021 13:42 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever I email a girl I like with my old flip phone I always make sure to finish it off by writing "Sent by IPhone 5G Mobile Device" so she thinks I'm hip.
←Rate | 01-16-2021 11:41 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whoever said "Rome wasn't built in a day" needed to log out of Facebook.
←Rate | 01-24-2021 12:16 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whoever said "Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today" knew how to log out of facebook.
←Rate | 01-24-2021 12:43 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon To all 6 of you who like the jokes I post, I do it all for you!
←Rate | 01-26-2021 12:18 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Find the man strokes your hair and says how soft it is and doesn't care if it's on your legs.
←Rate | 01-26-2021 19:49 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon So who's ready for the holiday for singles the day after Saint Valentine's Day! You know 50% off cake and candy day.
←Rate | 01-27-2021 11:06 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before there was Facebook and Twitter there was "As World Turns" and "The Days of Our Lives" for cusip.
←Rate | 01-30-2021 19:56 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Her: What sign are you most attracted to? Me: The Dunkin Donuts sign.
←Rate | 01-31-2021 00:21 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hate how my automatic spell checker turns sentences like "I'd be happy to work for you" into "I'd be happy to twerk for you" which would be great if I was looking for a job as a Chippendale dancer.
←Rate | 02-03-2021 10:00 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon To all my secret admirers. With Valentine's Day just around the corner if you'd like some candy and flowers it's too expensive for you to reveal yourself now, but maybe next year!
←Rate | 02-05-2021 15:55 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon A clean house and finish projects is the sign of someone who hasn't looked at Facebook in a while.
←Rate | 02-05-2021 17:34 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Your The Only One For Me" Valentine's Day cards on sale 2 for $5 just seems wrong, totally wrong.
←Rate | 02-14-2021 11:58 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you want to know why Paul McCartney never invited Ringo to dinner, he wouldn't share the drumsticks.
←Rate | 02-15-2021 00:34 by Moon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you hear about the new squirrel diet? It's just nuts.
←Rate | 02-15-2021 00:38 by Moon Comments (0)  




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