Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 274 of 6386
Some fairy tales begin with "Once upon a time..." Others begin with "If elected, I promise..."
←Rate |
04-18-2021 15:22 by M
Comments (0)
How Dawn clean ducks but not my spaghetti bowl??
←Rate |
04-17-2021 12:01 by Eke
Comments (0)
Why do we only rest in peace? Why don't we live in peace too?
←Rate |
04-17-2021 09:14 by M.M.
Comments (0)
How many rounds of the vaccine do you need before you can stop wearing the tinfoil hat?
What if you take Johnson & Johnson, Pfizer, and Moderna at the same time and just let them fight it out inside you?
147 mass shootings in US already this year: let's make it easier to buy guns....2 cases of voter fraud in 2020: let's make it harder to vote (rolls eyes back).
←Rate |
04-16-2021 18:35
Comments (0)
It's sad when I watch the news and the Weatherman is the one closet to the truth...
←Rate |
04-16-2021 15:03
Comments (0)
Matt Gaetz says "I'm there, before the hair".
←Rate |
04-16-2021 13:45
Comments (0)
Bruh. This pollen aint got no business seasoning us like we chicken.
←Rate |
04-16-2021 13:02
Comments (0)
The only thing you can believe from CNN, MS-NBC, ABC, CBS, NBC and WaPo that resembles accurate and factual reporting are yesterday's sports scores.
←Rate |
04-16-2021 11:43
Comments (0)
I and my friends happened to be viewing the excellent points found on the blog and all of a sudden developed a horrible feeling I had not thanked the web site owner for those techniques. These men had been for that reason passionate to read them and have
←Rate |
04-16-2021 09:58 by offwhite
Comments (0)
The best thing about dating a homeless woman is that you can drop her off anywhere.
←Rate |
04-15-2021 14:32
Comments (0)
Witnesses says that Gaetz acted like a party frat boy. I wonder which frat hose he belonged to? Imma tappa minor?
←Rate |
04-14-2021 23:47
Comments (0)
There is so much misplaced anger in this world. And so much of it is aimed at Brussels sprouts. Sad.
←Rate |
04-14-2021 13:46
Comments (0)
As someone who got the J&J shot last week, so far my only side effect has been the ability to control geese with my mind
←Rate |
04-14-2021 09:20
Comments (0)
If the Powerball has taught me anything, it’s how to turn $200 into $4.
←Rate |
04-14-2021 08:44
Comments (0)
It's scary when the weatherman is the closest one on the news now to telling the truth now.
←Rate |
04-13-2021 16:07
Comments (0)
The Sopranos would've been better without Carmela, Carmela's parents, Meadow, Meadow's friends and Jean Cusamano.
←Rate |
04-13-2021 15:49
Comments (0)
“Should we take the kayak or just walk out to the sandbar?” -Row versus wade.
←Rate |
04-13-2021 14:56
Comments (0)
Yeah, I’m allergic to wheat, but I really like it so I eat it anyway. I’m a real gluten for punishment.
←Rate |
04-13-2021 14:50
Comments (0)