Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
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...and thats how the U.S. outdoes a Royal Wedding.

You are not essential for my survival so adjust your actions accordingly.

A new tape huh? Man,not only is Osama the Jordan of hide and seek,he's the tupac of terrorism.
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05-02-2011 23:54 by @qpid901
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No I did not watch the Royal wedding! What's the big deal? Two things kept me from watching it. They're called tesicles.

Whooooooooooo lives in a pineapple under the sea ...O...S...A...M...A
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05-02-2011 23:23
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I shot Big Foot last night but I dumped the body in the ocean before I could get a picture.

It's amazing what the Americans can do when the PS3 network is down.
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05-02-2011 22:46
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Navy Seals.......Terminix for a larger cockroach........
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05-02-2011 22:41
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says it is comforting to know the last person Osama Bin Laden saw on this Earth was an American
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05-02-2011 22:40
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and took him out. This is NOT an Obama victory, but an AMERICAN victory!!
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05-02-2011 22:19 by ff1241
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the moral of the story is never send a white man to do a black mans job...
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05-02-2011 21:55
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So they really buried Osama in the ocean..Did Americans not learn their lesson when they buried Megatron?!
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05-02-2011 21:47 by Luis Lugo
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better yet ... we shoulda just captured bin Laden .... tied him to the tallest pole, atop the highest mountain .... and flown a plane into him.
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05-02-2011 21:36
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Ironically this comes close to Obama's reelection! Hmmm... I think Obama and Osama are either working together or the same person!
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05-02-2011 21:28
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How do vampires shave if they can't see in the mirror?
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05-02-2011 21:19
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Girl finds her prince, the bad guy gets killed, like we're living in a fairy tale this last week...
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05-02-2011 21:06 by mm187
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it is comforting to know the last person Osama Bin Laden saw on this Earth was an American

Glad we finally found OBL. Now can we find the dead beat dads thats dont pay child support or play a role in their kids lives?
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05-02-2011 20:47
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Hell just installed bunk beds - I heard Osama bin Laden got the bunk under Saddam Hussein....
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05-02-2011 20:28
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If I was Obama, I would have made my speech entrance by pushing a wheelbarrow with Bin Laden's body in it, dumped it on the ground and said, "We got him." That would've been bad-ass!
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05-02-2011 20:15 by CB
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