Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   there a toilet in your mouth or are you just talking crap again?

   If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0

   What's that you say? I can't hear you over my free health care and worldly education. Douchebags!

   Well,today was a total waste of makeup.

   ...just heard that the "Octomom" won't rule out having another baby...well then, I think we can safely rule out her having even one more brain cell left...

   REMEMBER IN FAT AND SLIM: F - STANDS FOR FOOD AND S - FOR STARVATION

   I got F C and K. The only thing missing is you !

   YOU! Out of the Gene Pool.

   Feel free to call me a Hottie.

   CAUTION: Blonde Thinking

   Feel free to kiss my third point of contact.

   I see dumb people.

   I went to buy a pair of camouflage pants, I couldn't find any!

   you can cross my mind, run thru it, play in it, bouncee across it, dance in it, there is alot of room in there...

   says the art of typing an FB status is directly proportional to the work done on google search

   out clubbing last night, beat my record of 24 seals!

   Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain and most fools do

   Fine Arts < Real Education

   It tastes like I coughed up blood...hello liver damage, I've been expecting you

   I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.