Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   the weapon of choice.

   a PC

   finding the cure for hunger.

   works hard because millions on welfare depend on me!

   sells seashells by the seashore

   "sometimes he feels like a nut, sometimes he don't "

   so great Tony the tigers jealous

   wearing more make up than a clown

   finding new uses for bananas

   bringing sexy back... to the store for a refund!

   planning to fill in this blank.

   "used to care, but now I take a pill for that!! "

   in your refrigerator.

   promoting global warming.

   going crazy...Want to come?

   laid back...with my mind on my money and my money on my mind

   runs on Dunkin

   not buying anything Michael Moore says anymore

   more bars in more places.

   not scared of heights.... just widths!!!!