trump Funny Status Messages

   Donald Trump said he doesn't trust anyone with a foreign sounding name, and neither does his daughter "Ivanka."

   I felt like the ending of this weeks episode of Trump was kind of boring. Right? I guess the writers are building to something big.

   Trump is a living embodiment to an erection that lasted more than 4 hours.

   If we all pretend to not see or hear Donald Trump, I bet he'd just go away. After all, his narcissism is based on attention.

   Most Mexicans affectionately refer to Donald Trump as "El Piñata."

   If Trump wins, I'm going to open a florist shop near the Mexican border. And yes, I will call the shop "Wallflowers."

   Donald Trump says he didn't discuss Mexico paying for the wall with President Nieto because he thought he was the janitor.

   Even Donald Trump's previous marriages lasted longer than Brock Turner's prison sentence.

   Melania Trump suing a newspaper and a blogger for $150 million over allegations she was a hooker means her pimp would get 90% of that money.

   Donald Trump's father's favorite song was "This Land is my Land, This Land is my Land."

   Donald Trump met with Mexican president Enrique Peña Nieto this week, so Trump can tell him how great the Mexican food is at Trump Tower.

   Hey Trump haters... You guys can still pee in the ladies room since you have been for years anyway

   Cut Gary Johnson some slack. Donald Trump thought Aleppo was one of the Marx Brothers.

   Roger Ailes is offering to sleep with all Female Trump supporters to raise money for charity.

   Trump promises to give generals 30 days to create a plan to defeat ISIS. He also wants them to create a perfume and shoot the ads or they'll be fired.

   Melania Trump homemaker tip: When sorting your laundry, don't forget to separate your deplorables from your coloreds.

   Trump Supporters in a basket? I guess that puts Hillary Supporters in the wood pile.

   Donald Trump is starting a petition to stop the sale of pre-shredded cheese. He’s very serious about trying to make the USA grate again.

   Dr. Oz pledges to avoid questions Trump doesn't want to answer. It's no big deal; it's not like he's a real journalist. Or a real Doctor.

   Trump's appearance on Dr. Oz will solely be for publicity and has nothing to do with real medical information. Same as all the other episodes.