nfl OR football OR superbowl Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Dearest Neighbors, Please do NOT call the police, it’s not domestic violence or a wild party. It’s football season, that’s just me screaming at my TV.
←Rate | 09-10-2018 06:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I get tired of all the drama of family getting mad and running out the door every Thanksgiving! I believe a man is allowed to watch football naked in his own house!
←Rate | 11-22-2012 18:00 by Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men in 20's play football, men in 30's play cricket and men in their 40's play Golf. Have you noticed the older the men the smaller the balls?
←Rate | 01-31-2011 11:05 Comments (2)  


   messageicon When Jimmy Garoppolo said he watches a lot of film, I thought it was talking about football
←Rate | 07-26-2018 10:01 by Kado Comments (0)  


   messageicon The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public :-)
←Rate | 04-19-2010 14:55 by Sumeet Chandok- Facebook Comments (0)  


   messageicon On the highway, getting passed by a minivan is the football equivalent to getting tackled by the kicker.
←Rate | 09-09-2012 14:57 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Analysts say Obama's new immigration plan will focus on deporting violent criminals. So, this could impact your fantasy football team.
←Rate | 11-21-2014 14:13 by Mark M Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thanks for all the birthday wishes. I also accept gifts in the form of beer, casual sex and football tickets
←Rate | 12-07-2010 12:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Next years Superbowl has been changed to Motel 6. They'll leave the lights on.
←Rate | 02-03-2013 21:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Superbowl: the only time in a year that you tell people to be quiet because a commercial is on.
←Rate | 02-06-2011 18:44 by @AaronHerman4 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I could pick winning football teams half as well as I pick the stupidest, slowest cashier in Walmart, I could afford to shop elsewhere.
←Rate | 09-13-2010 16:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon hates it when he goes to a Vuvuzela concert and people start playing football...
←Rate | 06-22-2010 08:16 by samdave69 Comments (0)  


   messageicon OK ladies....College football starts tonight!! You may now start to cheat, shop or whatever.....Just shut up and stay out of the Man Cave!!
←Rate | 09-01-2011 13:13 by urboyblue Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know what would would solve the whole Kaepernick issue? If only he was a better football player...
←Rate | 08-08-2017 22:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You post constant status updates about what TV show you're watching and what you're eating for dinner. You're not allowed to whine when people get excited for football once a week.
←Rate | 09-15-2010 19:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's pretty sad when the highlight of a three hour football game is out staged by a red m&m."
←Rate | 02-05-2012 22:40 by Dylan Bosch Comments (0)  


   messageicon A girl wearing a pink jersey is not a fan of football. She's just trying to bang someone who is.
←Rate | 09-15-2010 19:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Peggy - "Tell me you love me, Al - "I love football, I love beer, let's not cheapen the meaning of the word."
←Rate | 09-03-2011 10:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A lot can happen in 2mins during football.. Like 47 useless commericals..For instance..
←Rate | 01-22-2012 18:03 by @Seanathon77 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do men like football? Because the biggest priorities in football are also the biggest priorities in every man's life.... Scoring and Ball Security.
←Rate | 12-14-2012 10:58 Comments (0)  




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