Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon If no one told you that you're beautiful today well I'm not about to start. Move on.
←Rate | 06-20-2024 17:30 by Darkharbinger Comments (0)  

   messageicon For everyone out there struggling with self-worth, just know that there are people out there that care. It sure as hell isn't me, but someone does.
←Rate | 06-20-2024 10:48 by Jas Comments (0)  

   messageicon Not to brag, but I was alive when you could SLAM the phone down to hang up on someone. It was spectacular!
←Rate | 06-19-2024 08:41 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  

   messageicon Around this time in 2020 we couldn't find toilet paper. Now we can't afford it.
←Rate | 06-18-2024 10:08 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  

   messageicon If I am ever at death's door I am leaving a flaming bag of poop on his front steps
←Rate | 06-17-2024 00:32 by Darkharbinger Comments (0)  

   messageicon I can't dance to save my life, but when I step in dog crap, I can moonwalk better than Michael Jackson.
←Rate | 06-15-2024 05:59 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  

   messageicon Imagine that. Flag Day just happens to be in the middle of Fagg Month.
←Rate | 06-14-2024 07:31 Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's ironic that the two O's in 'cooperate' insisted on having their own separate sounds.
←Rate | 06-13-2024 17:35 Comments (0)  

   messageicon My body knows how old I am, but my mind refuses to believe it.
←Rate | 06-13-2024 05:45 by GaryKoenig Comments (0)  

   messageicon If we're going to have a whole month dedicated to one of the Seven Deadly Sins, I would rather it be Gluttony.
←Rate | 06-11-2024 06:05 Comments (0)  


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