Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Status message updates and sayings for your Facebook, Twitter, or Whatsapp profile.

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   messageicon "If you think Golden Corral is fine steakhouse dining, you just might be a redneck."
←Rate | 06-30-2016 20:34 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Hmmm ...Tuesday Bill Clinton has secret meeting on private jet with Attorney General Loretta Lynch, On Thursday The Attorney General has ALL Clinton Foundation emails sealed until 2018. Coincidence? or is it time to wake up to the corrupting of America!!
←Rate | 06-30-2016 20:17 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Hillary Clinton has been on more private jets than Donald Trump ..... and hasn't paid for a single one of them ...
←Rate | 06-30-2016 19:22 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Hunting Turkeys......
←Rate | 06-30-2016 15:21 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Republicans go home, you are drunk.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 15:13 by Klh Comments (0)  

   messageicon You shoot down a Russian plane at your own peril Turkey. 1 Russian Pilot = 42 Dead Turks.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 15:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon The three men who carried out Tuesday’s deadly attack on Istanbul’s Ataturk airport were all from parts of the former USSR, Turkish sources say.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 15:06 Comments (0)  

   messageicon ... DAMMIT ..... Stop the WORLD .... I wanna GET OFF!!!
←Rate | 06-30-2016 11:25 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I bet most people supporting Hillary Clinton can't even SPELL "Marxist/Socialist" let alone even know what it means ... and why it is bad for America.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 11:24 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Trusting people has made me.....the aszhole I am today.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 11:17 Comments (0)  

   messageicon It's safe to assume that anyone who has a wedding band tattooed on their finger was not a statistics major.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 02:41 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Treasure the years with your children while they are still distracted by bubbles.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 02:35 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Just sliced my tongue open by eating ham with a knife because I was too lazy to grab a fork.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 02:32 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Heterosexual Pride Day: It's great to see heterosexual people no longer have to live in fear because of who they're attracted to.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 02:27 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm pretty opinionated for a guy who walks around the house talking to his dog in a Hillary Clinton voice.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 02:24 Comments (0)  

   messageicon 'm pretty opinionated for a guy who walks around the house talking to his dog in a Bernie Sanders voice.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 02:23 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Trump will predict your weight. But if he gets it wrong you win a stuffed animal. No, one of the small ones the big ones are for show.
←Rate | 06-30-2016 02:20 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Has Donald Trump tweeted "appreciate the congrats" in response to Istanbul airport attack yet?
←Rate | 06-30-2016 02:18 Comments (0)  

   messageicon This is what happens when you let the generation that invented words like BAE, YOLO and FLEEK vote.
←Rate | 06-29-2016 23:05 Comments (2)  

   messageicon I would like to officially nominate Cersei Lannister to be the one to finally separate Church and State .... Once and For All!!!
←Rate | 06-29-2016 20:53 Comments (0)  


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