kg Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Ever notice that people who snore seem to always fall asleep first?
←Rate | 03-22-2010 02:30 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon •If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid seeing yourself in the mirror, because I bet that's what REALLY throws you into a panic.
←Rate | 03-24-2010 03:24 by kg Comments (1)  


   messageicon Ever parked on the wrong side of the gas station, then turn the car around to realize you are still on the wrong side? Me either...
←Rate | 03-28-2010 17:48 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Have you ever been on an elevator talking to someone (about nothing top secret really) and when anyone else walks in; everyone shuts up? Such a strange phenomenon...
←Rate | 03-29-2010 12:14 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Have you ever said goodbye to someone before a long trip or even to leave somewhere for good, but you end up having to come back moments later for something you forgot? Does it make the original goodbye lose all of its sentimental value? Just wondering...
←Rate | 03-29-2010 13:34 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just had a friend post "Awesome day, Dry spell broken." and his MOM clicked the like button and he responds "MOM! WTH?" and then she asks "oops how do I UNclick it?" HAHAHA!!
←Rate | 03-29-2010 19:07 by KG Comments (1)  


   messageicon If you must lie about your age, do what I do... tell people you're ninety-seven...they'll think you look freakin great!
←Rate | 05-20-2010 09:03 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men are good for two things and two things only... Going down on you and taking out the trash... And even then the only thing that seems to be done properly is taking out the trash
←Rate | 07-14-2010 00:17 by Kg Comments (0)  


   messageicon bumped into this cat at the gas station this morning getting coffee and he told me "Asalamalakum." I told him "I also like the Lakers!"
←Rate | 04-06-2011 17:23 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon just downloaded this Lebron tone for my phone but I can't hear it cuz it doesn't have a RING!
←Rate | 05-03-2011 13:31 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon The LA Dodgers are so broke, three players tested positive for Top Ramen
←Rate | 07-14-2011 15:29 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon A dyslexic man walks into a bra...
←Rate | 07-26-2011 13:07 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Randon thots by KG: If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
←Rate | 08-04-2011 05:51 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon in support of our brothers and sisters who just experienced the earthquake on the east coast, I think all west coasters should have the rest of the day off!!!
←Rate | 08-23-2011 14:55 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon i think the funniest thing in the world is my dad leaving me a msg on my cell thinking that I can hear him and actually pick it up...
←Rate | 10-03-2011 18:11 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did I already post my Alzheimer's status?
←Rate | 10-07-2018 17:57 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Time heals all wounds, so if your uninsured, get a watch!
←Rate | 10-08-2018 16:40 by KG Comments (0)  


   messageicon There are four stages of life: 1) You believe in Santa Claus 2) You don't believe in Santa Claus 3) You are Santa Claus 4) You look like Santa Claus
←Rate | 12-07-2018 15:37 by KG Comments (0)  



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