Charles323 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon wonders why - while changing your clothes at the YMCA - old men have to flaunt and swing their wrinkled junk around? Its like they're trying to prove their manhood or attempting to iron out the wrinkles, I'm not sure.
←Rate | 12-10-2010 02:27 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon was surprised to receive a compliment about his VW Jetta today - especially at a Mazda/GM car dealership. The salesman said: "Well German engineering, you can't go wrong. I just can't believe they killed so many Jews. You have a Merry Christmas."
←Rate | 12-18-2010 15:51 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon loves how Christmas movies capture the holidays in a way everyone typically experiences. In two hours: greedy men become charitable; enemies settle their differences; women fall in love with the unattractive nerd; and an angel get its wings.
←Rate | 12-19-2010 18:53 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon just passed a holiday cocaine drug bust. It looks like some people are gonna be denied a white Christmas this year.
←Rate | 12-19-2010 18:54 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon knows the world cannot end in 2012, because my GNC protein bars expire in 02/2013
←Rate | 01-09-2011 00:16 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon NEVER trust a man in a wheelchair with dirty shoes.
←Rate | 01-09-2011 00:18 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon a member of the Jehovah's Witness protection program.
←Rate | 01-09-2011 00:25 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon thought he saw a ninja while driving home today - turned out to be just a light pole...or was it?
←Rate | 01-09-2011 00:27 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon told the dog it is weird that he follows me into the bathroom all the time. So he walked out. Now I'm weirded out that he speaks English.
←Rate | 01-09-2011 00:47 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks the best nicknames are the ones people don't know they have.
←Rate | 01-09-2011 15:45 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks any convenience store that requires the customer to wear pants isn't convenient at all.
←Rate | 01-09-2011 18:06 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Allergy alert: This status may contain peanuts.
←Rate | 01-09-2011 20:57 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wonders how a fine is justified as a predetermined tax for doing something wrong, and yet taxation is accepted as a fine for doing well?
←Rate | 01-10-2011 02:16 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon told the dog it is weird that he follows me into the bathroom all the time. So he walked out. Now I'm weirded out that he understands English.
←Rate | 01-10-2011 13:29 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon believes insomnia is very common. Try not to lose any sleep over it. ツ
←Rate | 01-10-2011 15:28 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “I knew you'd be back.” -The Drawing Board
←Rate | 01-11-2011 13:07 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon while I drink my coffee, I oftentimes stare out the window and ask myself: Am I attractive enough to prostitute?
←Rate | 01-15-2011 16:08 by Charles323 Comments (6)  


   messageicon finally came out of the closet and told my family I'm white. It took a lot of courage on my part, but I felt it was time they understood why I can't jump or dance.
←Rate | 02-16-2011 17:36 by Charles323 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wonders if shaving one's head make one truly aerodynamic and thereby fuel efficient? And - can I claim that as a deduction on my taxes?
←Rate | 02-19-2011 17:20 by Charles323 Comments (0)  



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