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Chuck Norris Sayings (beta)

Chuck Norris Facts and Jokes

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"some people wear superman pajamas, superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas."
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Submitted: 01-06-2011 23:55 by all by Carolynn Comments (0)


Chuck Norris does not wear a condom because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris
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Submitted: 01-06-2011 23:55 Comments (0)


Chuck Norris bottles his farts and sells them on Craigslist as cans of whoop ass
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Submitted: 01-06-2011 23:54 Comments (0)


When Chuck Norris does pull ups he doesn't lower himself to the ground but lifts the earth to him
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Submitted: 01-06-2011 23:54 Comments (0)


When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
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Submitted: 01-06-2011 23:54 Comments (0)


Why did Chuck Norris' aunt give birth to him? no one had the balls to sleep with his mom
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Submitted: 01-06-2011 17:35 Comments (0)


If Chuck Norris sleeps he sleeps with one eye open cause he knows I will get him.
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Submitted: 01-06-2011 12:03 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)


"Chuck Norris once told Steven Hawkins to sit down, he hasn't gotten up since..."
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Submitted: 12-29-2010 14:14 Comments (0)


I don't need walls around my heart... why? because Chuck Norris is guarding it
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Submitted: 12-17-2010 20:28 Comments (0)


Chuck Norris was invited to a birthday party. He dared one kid to suck all the helium of the balloons. This kid is now known as Justin Beiber
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Submitted: 12-07-2010 22:00 by Galen Comments (0)


I Love listening to 2 fathers argue about who's kid is better. Cause both the kids end up winning Olympic medals or being Chuck Norris.
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Submitted: 11-25-2010 00:28 by Brad Matheny Comments (0)


"If Chuck Norris is so bad ass..please explain the TV show Chuck Norris: Karate Kommandos"""""
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Submitted: 11-23-2010 16:13 Comments (0)


If at first you don't succeed... you're not Chuck Norris
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Submitted: 11-14-2010 17:30 by mickeybruce Comments (0)


How the hell did Chuck Norris become so important?
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Submitted: 11-09-2010 12:48 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)


"...so, looking toward 2012, maybe we could use another Reagan. Hmm. Conservative B-Movie actor... I've got it!! Chuck Norris FOR PRESIDENT"
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Submitted: 11-06-2010 11:48 by mickeybruce Comments (0)


"I don't know where all these Chuck Norris jokes started from but they have to be the stupidest things I have ever read. They are not funny, they make no sense, and you are an idiot if you think they are funny."
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Submitted: 11-04-2010 19:18 by Chuck | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)


Thinks Chuck Norris can start a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together. What do you know about Chuck?
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Submitted: 11-04-2010 12:59 by @gnarleycharley Comments (0)


The movie Anaconda was shot it Chuck Norris's underwear...
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Submitted: 10-26-2010 13:48 by Pank Comments (0)


"Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris deflected all three bullets with his beard. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement."
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Submitted: 10-22-2010 14:29 by Michael Comments (0)


"Chuck Norris can rip your head off and throw it completely around the world before you die. Which is pretty cool because you're like Wheeee! I'm a satellite!"". But then you die. Unless Chuck puts your head back on."""
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Submitted: 10-17-2010 19:09 by mickeybruce Comments (0)


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