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Baddie Funny Status Messages
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Page: 9 of 15
You'd think the liquor store cashier could at least PRETEND not to recognize me.
21
4
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07-17-2013 12:35 by
Baddie
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0
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Releasing a long silent fart as I walk through first class on the way to my economy seat is definitely my favorite part of boarding an aircraft.
89
17
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07-13-2013 06:26 by
Baddie
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A part of me wants to go to the gym and the other part of me is a liar.
89
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04-25-2013 13:24 by
Baddie
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I hate it when strangers say silly things like, "I don't bite" Yeah, because the first thing I think when I meet someone is "OMG! This b!tch is gonna bite me!"
94
18
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02-25-2012 10:14 by
Baddie
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0
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I'm "used to get kicked off the internet when the house phone rang" years old.
47
9
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07-16-2013 02:00 by
Baddie
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Apparently going to coffee with your friends and coming back drunk is frown upon by management .
47
9
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07-17-2013 12:51 by
Baddie
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0
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My therapist goes to her therapist five minutes after I leave.
47
9
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10-31-2015 10:00 by
Baddie
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0
)
The worst thing about spanking a kid in Wal-Mart is that I have no idea who's kid this is.
73
14
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08-05-2014 14:44 by
Baddie
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0
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No one knows what women really want, but everyone agrees it still won't be enough.
99
19
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08-09-2013 13:16 by
Baddie
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Like a good neighbor,I don't really care.
52
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10-01-2014 14:03 by
Baddie
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0
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Has science explained why you have to walk around the house when on the phone?
26
5
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10-06-2014 02:26 by
Baddie
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0
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I just drank a whole pot of coffee and now I can stutter in sign language.
26
5
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05-26-2012 14:15 by
Baddie
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0
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Watching this cool nature show about a bunch of apes who think they can sing. It's called "Glee" or something.
26
5
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02-24-2013 11:06 by
Baddie
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If cartoons can wear the same clothes everyday then so can I dammit.
26
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04-13-2013 13:42 by
Baddie
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Did you know if you watch Twilight backwards, it's still sh!t?
57
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04-23-2012 14:40 by
Baddie
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0
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Co-worker keeps asking me what's wrong so I told her I'm irritated because some idiot won't quit asking me what's wrong.
31
6
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10-22-2012 14:05 by
Baddie
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0
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If you think sleeping with your girlfriend’s best friend will piss her off then you obviously haven’t tried hiding one of her shoes.
31
6
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07-05-2013 01:51 by
Baddie
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0
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Ran into the girl who broke my heart. Totally worth the damage to my car.
31
6
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07-16-2013 02:00 by
Baddie
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0
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Knock, knock. Honey, have you finished taking pictures of yourself for facebook? Daddy needs to take a sh!t.
67
13
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04-04-2012 13:45 by
Baddie
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0
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Exercise? I thought you said "extra fries".
72
14
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12-13-2014 07:32 by
Baddie
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