Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   When you "ASSUME" you make an "ass" out of "u" and Melissa Etheridge

   There should be a prenatal test to find out if you're gonna have one of those kids with tiny teeth and giant gums. I am just saying...

   Im 98% black the other 2% is milk.

   I dropped my laptop in the ocean,, now a dell is rolling in the deep.

   Boogity Boogity Boogity... Lets go racing boys!!!!

   What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

   I've been watching all this "Jubilee Queen" nonsense with the Queen of England. Seriously, is she ever happy about ANYTHING?? She never smiles and I think the ROYAL Spanks must be too tight!

   There is nothing worse than running out of toilet paper and having to ask the guy in the next stall to wipe you.

   Justin Bieber fathering a love child is hard to believe. Justin Bieber having a love child, now that I can believe.

   Drinking game: Every time he says I or me drink

   phillip seymour hoffman had a better super bowl sunday than the broncos

   Bruce Springsteen is my favorite Beatle

   How many of you have gotten into some serious trouble with your partner because of a comment made by some wayward fool on your FB status or wall?

   As long as I can still scare white folks, I'm not a sellout.

   Oh it's Cinco de Mayo....that's why I keep seeing cars with 22 people inside back through a red light with a traffic cam, family portraits!!

   What do you call Converse on a nun? Nunchucks.

   My idea was a naked version of DUNE called NUDE, but there are places no one wants sand.

   How can Bill O'Reilly be fired. The President assured as he is a good guy and didn't do anything wrong.

   If she's in love with Justin Beiner, she's too young for you bro!

   Life isn't about getting nude... Its about being nude.... Bring on National Nude Day