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The Legal Eagle Funny Status Messages
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...U.S. combat in Iraq officially over. I love Pres. Obama! He's the ONLY black guy I know who's kept his withdrawal promise!
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09-02-2010 11:26 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Brad Pitt may favor death penalty after BP oil spill. Says execs should hafta watch “Meet Joe Black” over & over til they kill themselves!
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08-25-2010 22:17 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Justin Bieber is new spokesperson for Proactiv. No wonder he has his hair combed forward. His forehead must look like Courtney Love's ass.
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08-23-2010 11:11 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Wyclef Jean disqualified for Haitian Presidency. Hey, that's no fair! If we elected an unqualified black man, why can't they?
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08-22-2010 16:30 by
The Legal Eagle
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Jet Blue steward Steven Slater offered reality show to help people quit their jobs. I'm gonna bet it won't be the first pilot he's done!
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08-17-2010 13:27 by
the Legal Eagle
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The Hoff's singing is huge in Germany. He should be proud. Germans have always been known 4 their sound judgment
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08-14-2010 20:11 by
The Legal Eagle
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Tiger Woods' golf game, marriage crumbles. I guess going from 120 holes down to 18 has been too hard an adjustment for him!
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08-12-2010 19:50 by
The Legal Eagle
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Montana Fishburne was a prostitue. Wow, a hooker AND a porn star! Or as Charlie Sheen would call her, “Perfect!”
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08-08-2010 12:45 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Kim Kardash begs fan NOT 2 get surgery 2 look like her. Kim's right. Someone in porn shoulda begged Heidi Montag not 2 look like one of THEM!
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08-07-2010 19:31 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Tila Tequila denies sex tape rumors. Good. When most Asians talk about doggie-style it usually means how they want their dinner prepared!
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08-07-2010 01:04 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Demi & Ashton tweet about doing master cleanse diet. Can't wait to see the pic of his 1st bowel movement taken w/the Nikon CoolPix camera... lol!
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08-06-2010 14:08 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Couple who said they had pix of John Stamos w/underage girl in hot tub were indicted for extortion. Turns out the "girl" was Justin Bieber!
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08-06-2010 14:05 by
The Legal Eagle
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16yr-old Gossip Girl Taylor Momsen says her bff is her vibrator. In creepier news, Justin Bieber says he won't leave home w/o his buttplug!
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08-06-2010 14:04 by
The Legal Eagle
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Chris Isaak may replace Simon on Idol. My vote is for Mel Gibson. How great will it be to hear him call a contestant a “c*nt, b*tch, wh*re?”
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08-06-2010 14:02 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Playboy launches work-friendly website. Still be nude girls but on every other page will be a naked pic of Hef to reduce workers' erections.
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08-06-2010 14:01 by
The Legal Eagle
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... Julianne Hough thought bf Ryan Seacrest was gay! I was so looking forward to the day when he said, “Seacrest Out…Of The Closet!”
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08-06-2010 13:59 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Bob Barker says he made “Price Is Right” exciting & Drew Carey doesn't. After telling this to TMZ, he quietly soiled his diapers.
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08-06-2010 13:58 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Ellen DeGeneres has left “American Idol.” Oh great, she quits the show where she DOESN'T dance like a retard.
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08-06-2010 13:54 by
The Legal Eagle
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...Snooki arrested at Jersey Shore for disorderly conduct. Cops let her go probably due to her strong resemblance to a donut... I'm just sayin'.
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08-06-2010 13:53 by
The Legal Eagle
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Artist makes portrait of Rachael Ray using Cheetos. Unfortunately, a ravenous Oprah devoured the entire thing while visiting the set.
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08-06-2010 13:49 by
The Legal Eagle
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