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What happened in 2012 stays in 2012... 
I've just invented a wireless, battery-free, hand operated hair-dryer.....I think I'll call it a 'Towel'.
HAPPY HANGOVER DAY
For anyone interested , I will be signing books at Barnes and Noble from 6PM until I am escorted out by securuty
Never ignore a person who loves you and cares for you. One day you may realise you've lost the moon while busy counting the stars.
Somebody died last night, but I didn't, somebody didn't wake up this morning, but I did, I'm not lucky, I'm blessed
My New Years Resolution is to be more positive and less sarcastic...I wonder how long this bull$hit fantasy will last.
Contrary to what you may think, my moral compass is not broken. It just happens to be pointing toward hell
I am not homeless but alot of homeless things happend to me.
For your information, we'll be remembered as the generation who thought a fat Korean pretending to ride a horse was entertaining to look at.
Facebook sure is quiet this morning....wonder why.
Happy New Year everyone....and may your worries this year last no longer than a Kardashian marriage .
When someone posts this: "Last year was wonderful....this year has been pretty awesome too! Can't stop smiling...bring it on!" It actually means: "I didn't do j@ck $hit."
The key to happiness is having something to look forward to. Lindsay Lohan turns 27 this year and there is this one club. She likes clubs.
Welp. Looks like I broke my new years resolution regarding procrastination....Guess who just p00ped their pants.
I remember 2012 like it was yesterday
Ok, just saw Jenny the Crypt Keeper dry hump a Bieber cardboard cutout. Seacrest should have gone down there and ash bombed her.
I have not taken a shower since last year
please no more gangnam style dance... keep the gangnam style back in 2012
Well happy new year to you all mine friends wish you all the best for 2013.. 