JB Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon If it doesn't kill me the first time... your damn right I'm gunna do it again!!
←Rate | 09-08-2011 14:17 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't regret my past I just regret the time I've wasted with the wrong people!
←Rate | 10-16-2011 11:53 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon U know I bet people would become a lot nicer if they sold people tags like they sell deer tags. Once a year you can buy a tag and take out that 1 special person
←Rate | 10-10-2011 04:41 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better...
←Rate | 10-10-2011 06:35 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon There's a few people that I wouldn't mind haveing installed on my driveway as speed bumps..
←Rate | 04-23-2011 04:11 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon I have a truck, shovel and a map, I dare you to keep pissing me off.
←Rate | 04-22-2011 21:18 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon Its Funny How Sitting "Boy Girl Boy Girl" Used To Be a Punishment.
←Rate | 10-16-2011 11:46 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.
←Rate | 11-06-2011 05:37 by jb Comments (0)  

   messageicon "Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."
←Rate | 04-23-2011 04:15 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon I Had a dream of you! You were drowning and I could not save you. All of a sudden God appeared and said, Fear not my child, crap floats!
←Rate | 10-18-2011 14:24 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon "I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances."
←Rate | 11-05-2011 07:11 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm aging like a fine wine ... which is to say, I'm building up pressure and about to become uncorked!
←Rate | 09-08-2011 14:10 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon I always know the right thing to say immediately AFTER the right time to say it has passed!
←Rate | 11-16-2010 17:20 by jb Comments (0)  

   messageicon if someone ever asks you what your favorite kind of beer is tell them " An open one!"
←Rate | 09-08-2011 15:51 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon They say life is one long and crazy ride. I wanna know how the hell did I get a ticket and can I get a refund!
←Rate | 09-08-2011 14:25 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like.
←Rate | 09-08-2011 14:50 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon "if I knew then what I know now...I'd probably still find a way to screw it up!"
←Rate | 09-08-2011 16:05 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon "The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind." :)
←Rate | 09-08-2011 16:21 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon My get up an go done got up and went and busted the hell outa my give a damn on it's way out!
←Rate | 04-23-2011 04:13 by JB Comments (0)  

   messageicon Had to call 911 today. They asked what my emergency was, I said, I'm being raped and robbed at the same time. They asked where I was, I said, The Gas Station!
←Rate | 09-08-2011 13:37 by JB Comments (0)  


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