g0re Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Why do ladies spend so much anger on The Other Woman? They should really be more infuriated with their cheating lover.
←Rate | 10-18-2011 01:53 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon They say that if a guy has big feet it means that he has a big pen!s. That just makes the thought of being raped by clowns even scarier.
←Rate | 10-26-2011 17:38 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon i have 2 sisters,one 14 and the other 6. the 14 year old was arguing with the 6 year old and said" SANTA ISN'T REAL!" without blinking,the 6 year old said"neither is edward cullen!" I don't wanna be mean so i'll say this,one ran away crying.
←Rate | 12-23-2011 15:25 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon The girls at Hooters may be hot, but when it comes down to it, the girls at Subway are the real wife material.
←Rate | 11-26-2011 20:29 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Overhearing someone ask their friend a question sucks when you know the answer, but can't exhibit your amazing knowledge without seeming like a weirdo for listening to their conversation.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 19:22 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon It sucks when you make a really awesome post but then someone steals your glory with an even better comment.
←Rate | 10-15-2011 19:23 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Only at Mcdonalds do they say,"Sorry about your wait" and really mean "weight.",
←Rate | 10-19-2011 20:18 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon You know when you have to wash the dishes when you are eating salad out of a coffee cup.
←Rate | 10-15-2011 19:22 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon How many teenage girls does it take to change a lightbulb? Eleven: one to change the lightbulb and ten to each take 200 photos of the event for facebook, clog up your news feed, and later on edit the pictures to black and white.
←Rate | 10-25-2011 16:47 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Wouldn't it stink if there were thousands of other planets that had life, and we on Earth were the ONLY ones who didn't know? And we were the butt of aliens' jokes, i.e. "You're stupid as an Earthling."
←Rate | 11-26-2011 20:42 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon If somebody does a backflip, they automatically become a bada$$.
←Rate | 10-13-2011 18:38 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Don't you wish common sense would make a big comeback.
←Rate | 10-14-2011 00:35 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Whoever said that nothing rhymes with orange clearly doesn't know the correct pronunciation of 'nothing,'
←Rate | 11-06-2011 20:24 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Today I changed my name in my dads phone to God and when he swore I texted him saying "I HEARD THAT!" The look on his face; priceless.
←Rate | 01-12-2012 21:44 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Boobs are like the sun, you can only take quick glances, but wear sunglasses and you can look until the world ends.
←Rate | 10-19-2011 03:29 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Anything that comes in a spray can doubles as a bug killer.
←Rate | 10-14-2011 05:03 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon It takes a brave man to admit he's wrong. It takes a braver man to not delete the original comment.
←Rate | 11-18-2011 19:32 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Candy companies need to learn that making a candy bar and eighth of its original size does not make it "fun sized," it just makes more wrappers to throw away.
←Rate | 11-02-2011 16:19 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon Childhood is like being drunk. Everybody remembers it except you.
←Rate | 10-12-2011 18:24 by g0re Comments (0)  

   messageicon I was so drunk last night when I got to the bottom of the stairs I took off my shoes, coat, top, pants and boxers as slowly as I could. I crept upstairs very quietly, it was only when I got to the top of the stairs I realised I was on the f*cking bus!
←Rate | 12-08-2011 00:03 by g0re Comments (0)  

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